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If a stupid looking movie like San Andreas can reap in $50M+, maybe I should just quit, liquidate all shares. America has no taste anymore.
Are the people of America really so moronical to think this would be a good movie? Worth their money? Their time? A portion of their life they'll never get back? Their gas, food, energy, etc--why would you pick a movie where the only character motivation is "OH watch your step ahhhhhhh!" Have people gotten stupider? Did people even see the previews? The posters that just scream "we don't even care." Is this intellectual warfare? Is there an autistic genetic trait rampaging through American eugenics? Have people not gotten enough of real life disasters? Maybe they should blow up their home (with themselves in it) if they want the same feeling: it's about as mentally enriching as San Andreas.
Good news is marketing can get even lazier now! Who needs innovation and creativity? Who needs inspiration, intrigue, wonder? No, not America? Guess not anymore. Last year really had me fooled, because I saw genuinely surprising, rich, multi-layered stories, characters, themes ("Whiplash," "Boyhood," "Birdman"). Now you can just slap the Rock's multicultural (read: multi-demographic) face on 80% of a poster, 20% "that looks like something action-y but I can't really tell," and people come flooding in these days. No need to try anymore! Isn't that good news for anyone looking to make movies? You don't have to waste time with learning, technique, style, etc.! Just slap words on a page, slap people in front of your camera, slap it on a DVD-R and now you can make $50M+.
And you know situations like this create precedents and encourage escalation, right? So if this is a "hit" (which means it has to not have its box office legs affected by JURASSIC WORLD still), what will happen next will be worse. "Tsunami Time." "Hurricane Season." "Earthquake 2: San Andreas' Fault." "Here Comes The Vortex." "Forest Fires: Unpreventable." "Too Monsoon?" "Global Disaster." "Global Disaster 2: Pandemic." "Hurricane Billy Bob Thornton." "Jewpocalypse." "The Life and Disastrous Times of Who Cares You're Gonna See This Movie Anyways." "Pay Up It's a Disaster Movie." "The End: Societal Implosion." "The End 2: Planetary Implosion." "Beyond the End: Universal Implosion." "Beyond the Beyond: Unobservable Universe--The Bigger Bang."
Yes, that's what you did America. Pat yourselves on the back. You invested in a niche that didn't deserve to be revived after it died a completely deserving death in the late '90s (which by the way the only improvement from those movies and the decades before it were CGI). The only time a disaster movie may deserve such an egregiously over-the-top, overblown, overinflated opening weekend would be when virtual reality becomes incorporated--yes, D-Box seats don't count. 3D doesn't count. IMAX doesn't count. These are not enough reasons to get tricked into seeing a basic, one-note, trashy, low-class piece of crap like that--but you did. Explains why your kids are flunking out of elementary school.
I'm serious though, I may be done with this game. This was an eye-opener. Why do I want to invest my interest in what the incredibly retarded people of America buy into anymore? Guess I just don't want to make a game out of how pathetic our culture can really be. You stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid people sure showed me, huh?
If a stupid looking movie like San Andreas can reap in $50M+, maybe I should just quit, liquidate all shares. America has no taste anymore. May 31, 12:13
try not to take it so personally. {nm} May 31, 12:15
Anymore? {nm} May 31, 12:18
Why so serious? {nm} May 31, 12:19
ROFL! {nm} May 31, 13:24
I watch what i personally want; I invest in want people want or don't want to watch. Keep those separate. {nm} May 31, 12:20
This is the right answer. {nm} May 31, 12:52
It sure is! May 31, 15:02
And that's YOUR opinion - never seen a horror film (or part of one) that was worth 2 cents of my time {nm} May 31, 20:33
The game is about quantity not quality {nm} May 31, 12:27
Just like your 20's -- #amIrite? (nm) May 31, 15:03
Both good and bad movies make money and lose money. Sometimes I understand why sometimes I don't. May 31, 12:29
Personally I stopped reading your rant at "autistic genetic trait" (inside) May 31, 12:31
See, I stopped reading at "moronical", because that's not actually a word. {nm} May 31, 12:52
I usually stop reading when the quick reply headline ends. {nm} May 31, 14:11
Did you short San Andreas OW and call by any chance ;) ? {nm} May 31, 12:41
I have $2B in my portfolio more than you. You think you're clever, but until you break $100M you don't know this game. {nm} May 31, 12:45
But seriously, did you short the .OW and the .CA? {nm} May 31, 13:01
But seriously, no. {nm} May 31, 13:22
To that end, you should watch a black and white silent film. There are rarely ever any of those. {nm} May 31, 13:01
You do know that of Birdman, Whiplash, and Boyhood, the highest gross of those three was $42 million? May 31, 12:50
If you turn off your brain and enjoy the crap, you really appreciate the good when it comes along. {nm} May 31, 13:15
Heh, I won't make the argument about Independence Day, it is certainly a guilty pleasure for me. May 31, 13:45
I {nm} May 31, 19:11
Easy reply to that loooong post. Shut up, quit whining. {nm} May 31, 13:00
I'm okay with that too. "Die Hard" isn't the deepest film ever, but everyone loves it because it was creative. That {nm} May 31, 15:30
Hello? SANDR looks like a guilty pleasure. Might even watch the DVD. {nm} May 31, 13:09
Have you seen sharknado the movie {nm} May 31, 13:25
Syfy's free? {nm} May 31, 13:39
Thats why films that make you "think" seem to have limited release {nm} May 31, 13:28
But if everyone liked the movies you are insisting they should like, how would you feel superior? {nm} Jun 01, 08:57
if you liquidate i move up one spot. just throwing that out there. {nm} May 31, 13:54
Secretstalker, is that you ... :-? {nm} May 31, 14:02
it does remind me of The Great Chipmunk Rant Of 2007 {nm} May 31, 14:15
there is almost no access to any HSX postings that happened before this new version of the site launched in June 2009 May 31, 16:09
If you survived HSX Orange.... you can survive any upcoming disaster porn revival! {nm} May 31, 18:24
lol dude mad. {nm} May 31, 15:34
I can't believe your so upset it was a good comedy. I found myself laughing a fair bit through the movie. {nm} May 31, 15:41
Did you see the movie? May 31, 15:55
Wow, skipped that long screed, but now you know how I felt after the first Jackass movie. {nm} May 31, 15:58
Sorry, anyone that has anything remotely good to say about Jackass has no business complaining about other movies {nm} May 31, 17:09
TIL: never invite chosenone2oo5 to a party {nm} May 31, 16:15
TIL: adrenalin112 is taking a piss. adrenalin112 hasn Also, Happy Gilmore and Top Gun both suck incredibly bad. {nm} May 31, 16:20
well i had to give you a 1 year head start to make it fair ;D {nm} May 31, 16:37
TIL: adrenalin112 thinks 4 months = 1 year. {nm} May 31, 16:55
The Towering Inferno...Poseidon Adventure...Earthquake...and a little James Bond...mix em up and you get SANDR. Sometimes May 31, 19:05
lol. I agree with. America deserves the Cinema they get {nm} May 31, 19:24
Wow - and there we have a big difference of opinion. I wasn't impressed AT ALL. and it was derivative and boring {nm} May 31, 20:26
On my gosh we agree. Just look at the foreign box office. Chosenone that's who you should be arguing with {nm} May 31, 20:28
this should have been under tristafe (aka professor smartbrain) post below {nm} May 31, 20:31
you are under the misimpression that Hollywood is making these movies for America anymore May 31, 20:00
Agreed. There's far more reliance on the international box office. {nm} May 31, 20:31
damn - put it in the wrong place again - goes below - but I think foreign seems to be more action instead of stars {nm} May 31, 21:09
Hey chosenone: Great post. You really got it rockin in here today. Nicely done. {nm} May 31, 20:43
Great thread. Good fun, thanks for posting {nm} May 31, 21:10
